Today is my birthday. I do not know why but I did not feel very happy this morning. I guess because this has been such a tough year. Losing Lolly Pop Kid was the single worst thing that I have ever been through. I did not feel like celebrating and I so wish I could change everything about this past year.
But. I. Can’t.
There were two amazing things that happened today. First LCpl Honda, who has been deployed since Sept. called me. It was hard to hear him, as it was on Christmas, but he called me to wish me a Happy Birthday. I never expected to get a call today. It was great to talk to him. I can’t wait for him to come home.
I went outside as the sun was rising and saw this.
Red clouds. Lolly clouds. I usually see them on Tuesdays. The day he became an angel. Taking a closer look, the cloud looks like an angel. I could be wrong, but I felt his love and birthday wishes. I had the realization that he does not want me to feel bad all the time. Which I already knew, but it is hard to live it. Still, it is hard to celebrate things in life when you are missing someone. It is hard to watch your family members hurt. It is hard to miss people that are not at home. It is hard to not know exactly what is going on with the people that are not at home. I hate talking in code. I hate OSPEC. I understand, but I still do not like it.
I guess I just needed a time-out today. I will go on. I feel very comforted by the events that have occurred already today. Tomorrow will be a new day. I will get up and move on. I know I will have bad days. But I will keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Today is my birthday. Thank you Lord for the gifts I received.